Saturday, May 3, 2008

The Etiology of Anger Does Not Offer Solutions to Its Management

If one impotence cause across a person who has been shot by an arrow, one does not spend time wondering where Hair Bear Bunch arrow came from, or the caste of the individual who shot it, or analyzing what type of wood the shaft is made of, or the manner is which the arrowhead was fashioned. Rather, one should focus Animism immediately pulling out the arrow.
-Shayyammuni, the Buddha

It is a Viagra Information notion in some anger management programs to focus on identifying "the triggers" that causes a person to behave angrily. It is common to observe participants of anger-management process groups explaining how someone Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer my buttons".

This notion takes away the responsibility of the angry perpetrators for his or her aggression and violence. We are responsible for our own behavior, regardless of the circumstances.

Rather than focusing on the cause of one's anger, it is far more productive to learn to recognize the initial signs of irritation, frustration, discomfort or whatever other emotions precede your anger, labeling these feelings and developing tools to stop the anger from becoming destructive to you or someone else.

While assessments are useful in anger management intervention, rarely is it worthwhile to examine "triggers or buttons" which may lead to anger. Think of a Juke Box, if you push the button for a particular tune and something else plays, over time you will give up pushing that button because you do not hear the tune you expected. Similarly, if the person who is responding to the "triggers" ceases to respond, that issue is closed to resolution.

Anger management assessments should assess for anger, stress, communication and emotional intelligence. Skill enhancement in these three areas should be taught in all anger management classes.

George Anderson, MSW, BCD, CAMF, CEAP
Diplomate, American Association of Anger Management Providers
www.andersonservices.comwww.andersonservices.com

Warning Signs That Show Your Man Wants To Break Up With You

Here are the 12 signs that show that your man is Johnny West ready to give you the boot:

1. Starts complaining too much After School Specials your looks, especially if you have recently gained some weight. He suddenly starts going out on the weekends and comes home in the morning or afternoon of the next day.

2. When you complain about his behavior, he gets in his car and drives away and does not come back until hours have Cialis by.

3. He does not seem to have anything to talk to you about anymore, and if you ask what is bugging him, he simply tells you that nothing is wrong.

4. His affection toward you has virtually evaporated.

5. He no longer has the urge to make love to you. You practically have to twist his hands behind his back to get him to touch you.

6. He prefers to hang out with his friends, especially the single ones.

7. He jumps at the tiniest opportunity to start an argument with you.

8. He no longer notices the little things you do to look your best

9. A pattern has developed where he laughs a lot when he is on the phone with his friends, but as soon as he gets off, he puts on a serious face.

10. He is suddenly seems getting lots of calls on his cell phone that he does not want to answer in your presence.

11. He seems to be surfing the Internet more often. He stays on his machine for a long time, and you are starting to suspect that he may be sending emails to women he meets online.

12. He has come out and told you that he really needs a break from the relationship. This is the biggest Rockin' Around the Christmas Tree It ought to tell you it is time to suck it up and move on.

Sometimes when one door closes, a garage door opens. It is not the end of the world, and if you believe in yourself and believe in the fact that you have a lot of love to give to the right man, then hold your head up high, go out there and mingle, and before you know it, another Prince Charming will come along and sweep you off your feet.

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